With the premiere of Canadian Idol last night, I thought it was only appropriate to talk about something I've had on my mind for awhile: American Idol and American Ideals.
America's favourite television show (franchise!) is very revealing of the state of America and it's grotesque consumerism. Of course, we Canadians are hardly excluded from the world of capitalist markets, (although we're always quick to point out how at least we're not as bad as those 'Mericans) so it was only a matter of time before we began our own worship of false Idols.
While the show stands on the pretense of discovering the next generation of musical talent, Jim Washburn (MSNBC) puts it best with the following analogy:
Have you been to a Disney park in the last decade or so? When you buy an overpriced soft drink or burger, the containers picture Mickey giving you positive reinforcements, like "Mmmm, this sure is delicious!" You certainly can't be trusted to decide that for yourself. The singing aside, "Idol" is basically nothing but a shamelessly self-congratulatory container, endlessly hyping you on what an unbelievably awesome phenomenon you're lucky enough to be seeing.
The show is a perpetual motion machine of gross commercialism. This bloated juggernaut of advertising has occupied hour-long time slots with over 20 minutes of commercials. That's one minute of commercial for every two minutes of programming. If not a record in the industry, it should be. Of course this does not include the obligatory video segments, posing as "behind-the-scenes" spots of the contestants, which are nothing more than billboard space thinly veiled with a plot. On top of that are the ever-present Coca-Cola and Ford logos, nestled tightly into the corners of the screen. And be sure to place your vote by dialing the AT&T hotline.
In a ironic twist, one of the final episodes of the season aired on the same day as the FCC held hearings in Atlanta discussing charges that increased corporate media conglomeration works contrary to democracy and an informed media. And following that episode? Fox News devoted it's first seven minutes to guess what, American Idol.
Another interesting fact is the contract that all contestants had to sign. If you win -- and EVEN if you DON'T, at the producers' discretion -- you are bound to a recording contract, management contract, and merchandising contract with UK's 19 Group (remember the Spice Girls?).
What a remarkable setup. "Idol's" two-nighter finale drew a huge audience, and couldn't have cost much to create, since it relied heavily on replay footage and the show is made without the stars' salaries, costly scripts, changing sets, location shoots, special effects and other overhead inherent to traditional TV.
Along with its massive ad revenue, the show serves as an ad for your company singers' products, which you utterly control (many in the industry consider it a conflict of interest for the label to also be the artist's manager), while your artists are reputedly locked into a royalty rate lower than the norm, and you own their works, name and likeness "throughout the universe in perpetuity" meaning they can't even sing in the Pleiades in 4003 without your say-so.
THROUGHOUT THE UNIVERSE IN PERPETUITY. They OWN you. A deal with the devil is a less binding contract than this. Yet all the contestants were plenty willing to sell their souls for empty promises of stardom and success. The American Dream dangled before their eyes, but they can't reach for the carrot until they promise to wear a straight-jacket. Interesting, eh?
Not to mention that it seems that the voting system was modelled directly after the most recent presidential election. It's a sad day when TV and Radio land are ruled by an unelected Idol.
And after Canadian Idol, we can look forward to American Juniors, where younguns 6 to 13 years of age will similarly have the opportunity to sign away not only their futures, but their innocence as well.
The ads, after showing the children doing their best Star Search routines, hook us with "If you thought the kids were intense, wait until you meet the parents". The latter half of the spots are filled with parents throwing tantrums and desecrating every meaning of the word sportsmanship. For some reason this deserves equal attention. The influence of Jerry Springer is far reaching indeed.
How befitting of our national "heroes",
- The Madd Monk
Source Material:
MSNBC Entertainment & Arts, "Riding on idle with American Idol", 05/22/03
American Id(ea)l 
